Revised MerMay Challenge Illustration
Norman Morana last edited by Norman Morana
I wanted to share my revised illustration from May's Mermay Challenge. First image is the submitted image and the second is where the illustration is at now. The big take aways from the feedback was to vary up the sizes of objects, to use contrast to better direct the viewer, and make the mermaid's pose work in the scene.
I've been chipping away at this for the past month. The biggest struggle I ran into was the mermaid. Originally I wanted her to be escaping from the bowl, then realizing she was being watched. That wasn't reading to people and after exploring more options with that, I realized it wasn't going to work, escaping that way in this situation wouldn't make sense. After going through a ton of poses, I landed on one I think is working better.
Let me know if you think the size of the objects should be pushed more.
@Norman-Morana This is definitely an improvement! I really like the changes you made. Love the mermaid's pose, but I think what isn't coming across in the story are actually the cats! The mermaid seems scared now (that's reading well) but the cats are so non-threatening that the story still isn't coming across as clearly as it could. What if there was a cat on the table or near it, looking at the mermaid? Having a cat much closer would convey a much more pressing threat. You're also now losing the "trying to escape" aspect of the story with your new pose. She could instead be facing us, trying to escape in our direction and freezing with a "gulp" expression on her face as she sense an imminent, pressing threat at her back. I think that might convey the story clearest!
MichaelaH last edited by
@Norman-Morana What about puting one cat near us, standing and holding the table with her paws, where the mermaid is? on the right side?
chrisaakins last edited by
@Norman-Morana Also when cats start to stalk their eyes widen and their pupils dilate. Maybe if they had a more sinister aspect to them
Norman Morana last edited by
@NessIllustration @MichaelaH @chrisaakins Hey Gang, thank you all for taking the time to give feedback on this piece, I really appreciate it! I'll play around with some of these ideas and see where it takes the illustration