4 Dec 2020, 15:17
@Elisa-Miko-Price agreed. Great suggestions. This draw over looks solid.
Looking For Advice. Something seems off
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Hello! I’m relatively new to the forms and wanted to ask some advice on a piece I’ve been working on.
It is for a art contest at my school and the prompt is “When I grow up.” I am going to put a warrior princess on the tapestry but before I do that I want to make sure the character looks right. She looks a little removed from the environment. I think it has something to do with the lighting but I’m not too sure. Any advice is appreciated. Thanks!
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@Stephen-Dueck Based on the the shadows direction on the tapestry, left side column, and her dress, it looks like you should have some lighting on her left side. Maybe just some rim lighting, but I think that will help sit her in the environment better.
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I agree with what A.j. said about rim lighting. My suggestion for you would be to reposition the sword to be turned slightly upward to point at the tapestry. I think swords can be interesting leading lines, so you can use it to your advantage by having the sword's point leading my eyes to where you want me to look next.
Also I would remove some of the toes, they're giving the feet a sort of duck feet look.
Here's a draw over where I added the rim light, upturned the sword and edited the feet. Hope it helps! Good luck with your contest!
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@Elisa-Miko-Price agreed. Great suggestions. This draw over looks solid.
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@Elisa-Miko-Price
I agree with all of your points! Thanks so much. I’ll work in the edits and send what I come up with. -
I was going to suggest moving the sword as well. One more thing I'd add about the character - I think her sword am should be slightly bent. A relaxed pose would have a bend in the arm. OR - Maybe even better- what if the character's pose mimics the pose of the warrior princess. It would make for a more dynamic composition and the reason for the scene would be even more clear. Good luck!
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Are those lanterns lit? I would make them the brightest thing in the scene.
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@Elisa-Miko-Price I agree. The light seems intense so maybe the design is actually "magically" bright and that's whats casting the light on her would bring it in.
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another suggestion is either make the stone wall go into the dark or make the stones get closer together. or make the lines just blur out. Seems like a lot of detail in a nonfocused area. also The pillar against the wall I think the base should line up against the wall. The top seems flat against the wall and the bottom seems like there is a space
Michael Mattocks
Https://instagram.com/mattocksdesign/ -
@MichaelMattocks Yeah that third board was supposed to be a baseboard but I will just get rid of it.
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Thank you all so much for the suggestions. Here is the piece with the edits and a sketch of the tapestry. If you see anything else that seems off please let me know!!
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@Stephen-Dueck this is looking great - for me I’m thinking the sword is not necessary and is very focal at the moment. I would love to see it without the sword and with the puppy version of the beast at her side that is in the tapestry instead... I think that would be more effective in showing that the character in the tapestry is also the little girl. Possibly having a slight gesture to her pose might be good too - she is very straight up and down at the moment - really nice piece!
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@Stephen-Dueck I completely understand what you are saying. The lady in the tapestry is actually the girls mom and I wanted to give her the sword to clearly show that she wants to become a warrior when she grows up. Thanks for the input tho!
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Here is the final piece! Thank you so much for all your input. I can see how valuable this community is. I look forward to learning more from you all.
