@Johanna-Kim Thought I'd share my progress. Among the many revisions, changed the composition to give the feeling of the tortoise moving slowly, omitted the red tracks and left green dots to indicate his past movement, and added carrot speed bumps. Any additional notes, good and bad, are most welcome. slow-race2.jpg
I fleshed out the new sketch a bit, and I prefer these character designs.
The composition feels more symmetrical now (each character roughly centered on each half of the page), which isn't usually something I'd go for, but I think it might work here, where there is direct comparison being made between two characters. What do you think?
@Sarah-VanDam Thank you for your comments! Yes, I agree, this piece could have benefitted from some preliminary sketches to work out the anatomy and structures. I always wrestle with the balance of the loose strokes and the tight drawing. I think sometimes when I start from a details place it just gets stiff looking. I did some home work on the bikes and they seem to hold up a little better. I was thinking the contrast of the mechanical bike with the organic animals would work. I was also trying to be conscious of the hierarchy of legibility and importance of the elements. I agree, it would have been fun to add a bunch of structures, I just thought it might distract from the main focus. Thank you again, I'll work on that anatomy.
@Rebecca-Jensen thanks for the feedback that would’ve been a great pov! Perhaps on another I’ve already submitted this one I know it’s not the best of my entries and that’s ok. Maybe I can rework it for the old portfolio, huh?
@PenAndrew oh no, you all are good lol. More just thinking about the work I want to do or be hired for. The sea monster illustration was a fun to explore but it was for this contest. If I’m going to spend more time on it I want it to fit me better.
I like the rendering, your animals are so soft and touchable! I got a little lost in the sandal texture being like toes but that might be a me problem. The lighting added to confusion about the story, I did think the boy wanted to help them but I couldn’t tell from what. For some reason I think of otters as able to weather storms because they swim a lot. That’s not logical but I do lol. I thought maybe a fire or headlights, they had food so it wasn’t that. I want the colors to work somehow because they are so striking and go together well.
Thank you for all the feedback and suggestions!! I’m really new to the forum here and still trying to figure out how to really dig in and contribute, but I’m looking forward to being more a part of this.
@Frogpunzel Mm you're right! I didn't actually think about the direction of the rain, and how that stopped it from looking like an incoming threat. I appreciate your critique, and those were all great suggestions. Thanks!