December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated :)



  • I think for the next week or two I'm gonna try and really REALLY nail down a colour study that I like. It never ever looks quite right.

    Maybe a softer light (candle or lighter would be better than a strong directional light. We'll see πŸ˜ƒ

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  • Very cool to see your process!



  • Wow this will be so great, love the story and composition


  • SVS OG

    @Braden-Hallett Awesome as always! Not sure why I want the mice to be crafty little mutineers on a pirate ship and the lady to be the pirate captain....but i do πŸ™‚


  • SVS OG

    @Braden-Hallett hahahahaha πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ this is hilarious. I love it!



  • @Braden-Hallett this us great! I love the storytelling



  • I really like the light - The way it shows through the floor and on the woman's face and on the mice.



  • This is a really cool idea! Quite outside the box πŸ™‚ For light - nighttime light is tough. I think it helps to add an additional layer filled with a single color on multiply, but I don't know if this is professional πŸ˜‰ The perspective is not quite right yet. Seems the bed is high up above the ground. I don't know how to do it better though, because you need her close to the attic ...



  • @Braden-Hallett haha wow didn't see this concept coming πŸ˜ƒ good job.

    I was thinking that the expression of the old lady could be more intense? Maybe she is angry and surprised at the same time? (like what the F i just heard?!) kind of puzzled look as she is thinking about it? I picture that she wouldn't have a clear looking direction in this situation (like when you focus your hearing to a sound you cant see - you will have a blank look)

    I figure that this might hurt your composition tho πŸ™‚ so its up to you, but you can try it maybe idk. πŸ™‚



  • @Braden-Hallett

    πŸ™‚ I don't know if this is just my erk but I don't like the light bulb being right in the centre. I also thought the old lady at first was an old man with one of those old style judge wigs, her hand and other features are strangely large or more masculine a shape. My only last doozy is that she and her bed look like they are floating or have been lifted off the ground.

    Ending with the good bits (so I thought) that I like. I love the rats portion, the composition, the number of mice, the process of eliminating the old lady - what could work best (though maybe have the rat leader pointing to one idea instead of off to the side and maybe fiddle with the colour of the potion (mixture) maybe connect it more with a colour down with her ladyship - a blue/cooler colour -your ladyship lols has some of the warmer pinks colours down below. I know you may bounce some of the light down or to the side onto other things (class in memory).
    Like the story and the expected drama.

    I know your still doing colour (class). Is the pink outside the door bringing in light -that would my assumption - not sure how I feel about that much pink -the other areas minus the potion make sense.

    Lastly (so I thought) I think it's comical that the old ladyship knows just where to eyeball those sneaky rats.

    I am sorry I have so many points to mention, please forgive me.
    For me for your story, I think your giving too much away. Let's see if I can explain: the rats have a devious plan, I read the light bulb is their way in (maybe yes maybe no), so their smarter than the average and they know the ladyship is right below them. Yet they don't seem to care or notice there are 3 big enough holes (light is fierce) for the flashlight's light to pierce down to her ladyship's room for their presence to be noticed. Also to note if the holes are underneath the leader rat (he would be stepping on them in which case he would notice them, if not fall partly through lols...) or in front (in which case he would have walked over them and seen the light escaping) or behind (he wouldn't nec see them but probably would walk into them as he turned to explain)? Perhaps I am reading to much into it. But if you were as smart and well planned as these rats why choose a room to plan this risky endeavour when you knew your secret could be exposed by three holes right above your victim.

    Now as I am thinking and thanks to my mother -could be slits in the floor board, ah in that case if you could convey that more in the wood floor that would have helped me out personally as well as maybe sparse up the light coming down (looks fierce).

    Anyways... I still love your idea and I hope these observations are not too hard on you. πŸ™‚



  • @Braden-Hallett that’s funny Braden πŸ˜‚
    It’s actually brilliant.
    .
    If I was being really annoying And picky which I guess I am, I’d tone down the saturated yellow Light streaks.
    I do love the colours though it’s working brill



  • @Meta said in December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated πŸ™‚:

    I think it helps to add an additional layer filled with a single color on multiply, but I don't know if this is professional

    From what I can tell if it works, then it's professional πŸ˜‰

    @Meta said in December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated πŸ™‚:

    The perspective is not quite right yet

    I usually wind up not going far enough because I'm always scared that the perspective is off. So this time I'm really trying to go for overly exaggerated cartoony 'perspective' πŸ™‚ Although if is this supposed to be 5 point perspective then it's absolutely off πŸ™‚ I may go back and fiddle with things a bit when I redo the colour study



  • @Jonas-Zavacky Thanks! The look on the lady's face is definitely gonna change. Right now this is more of a colour study (I'll really figure out expression and design in the clean sketch phase) πŸ™‚



  • @Heather-Boyd said in December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated πŸ™‚:

    her hand and other features are strangely large or more masculine a shape. My only last doozy is that she and her bed look like they are floating or have been lifted off the ground.

    Oh, her design's definitely gonna change πŸ™‚ Right now I'm more trying to figure out colour and value. As for the bed floating I'm trying to super exaggerate a cartoonish perspective. I think exaggerating more with maybe her hand holding the knife REALLY near the camera might help to distract people from the floating bed phenomena πŸ™‚

    @Heather-Boyd said in December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated πŸ™‚:

    I know your still doing colour (class). Is the pink outside the door bringing in light -that would my assumption - not sure how I feel about that much pink

    I'm not sure how I feel about it either. I was thinking another colour of cool light would be better to highlight the rat traps on the floor so went with the warmer cool if you get what I mean. Maybe a slightly greener blue (cerulean I think it is?)

    @Heather-Boyd said in December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated πŸ™‚:

    could be slits in the floor board, ah in that case if you could convey that more in the wood floor that would have helped me out personally as well as maybe sparse up the light coming down (looks fierce).

    Yup, that's what I'm goin' for πŸ˜ƒ You're right though, it needs a tone down. I'll have to find reference. If only we were taking a class for that sole purpose πŸ˜„

    @Heather-Boyd said in December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated πŸ™‚:

    For me for your story,

    at this point the only story I'm goin' for is rats hate lady, lady hates mice, lady uses traps, rats are goin' for poison :smiling_face_with_open_mouth_smiling_eyes: It's super neat that you picked up that much story from the colour study though.

    @Heather-Boyd said in December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated πŸ™‚:

    I read the light bulb is their way in

    I hadn't thought of that, though it makes a lot of sense! My big reason for having the light bulb below with its electrical stuff stretching into the ceiling was to connect the two different areas somehow.

    @Heather-Boyd said in December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated πŸ™‚:

    but I don't like the light bulb being right in the centre

    I'm thinkin' the light bulb may need a new home as well πŸ™‚ Maybe further left so that it helps to lead the eye back up from the doorway to the rat realm

    @Heather-Boyd said in December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated πŸ™‚:

    I still love your idea and I hope these observations are not too hard on you

    You are not being harsh at all! I love this kind of feedback and it is always most appreciated πŸ˜ƒ These observations can take something from 'okay' to portfolio piece!



  • @peteolczyk said in December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated πŸ™‚:

    If I was being really annoying And picky which I guess I am, I’d tone down the saturated yellow Light streaks.
    I do love the colours though it’s working brill

    Absolutely πŸ™‚ I'm plannin' on doing a few more colour studies and toning down those streaks of light is high on my list



  • I love this so much! There are so many things screaming awesome with this piece. The plan to off the ol' lady, the trail of mousetraps showing that this is a continuous problem, the 'perspective' choice and how the top/bottom warp through the ceiling, down to the colors and color scheme. This is a great start and I cannot wait to see where this goes.

    Feedback is minimal really:

    1. I love the heavy lines and jowls that emphasizes how old the lady is. Someone mentioned they didn't notice she was a 'she' at first. I think the lips could use a little more punch but I feel like you have the right plan with the curlers. They are a great way to show that its a woman and will show after cleanup.

    2. The light-bulb is vital to showing that the warped part is a ceiling and meshing the two areas, however I don't like the center placement. My eye wants to go to the mice but I keep getting drawn to the strong silhouette of the light socket.

    3. I think that the warping of the ceiling is a little too wide on both ends. I want to see those mice feet.



  • @Braden-Hallett I love your idea and the story. Love the details in this piece: the rat traps on the floor, and the drawing behind the rats. It helps to communicate the story so much.

    I also felt the light bulb does not add much to the story, and being a bit too prominent on this image.

    I would also try the idea of adding a few pictures on the wall to show the personality of this old lady.



  • @BradAYoo said in December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated πŸ™‚:

    I want to see those mice feet

    Mice feet are indeed essential πŸ™‚ I'll see what I can do! Thanks for the feedback



  • @xin-li said in December contest WIP as is tradition. Feedback always appreciated πŸ™‚:

    I also felt the light bulb does not add much to the story, and being a bit too prominent on this image.

    I think I may try moving it over to one side or another πŸ™‚ Out of the centre line but still in the picture



  • @Braden-Hallett I claim to be a pretty fast drawer, but when it comes to perspective ... I just take looong. Maybe this is due to my perfectionism ...? You have the same problem?


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