critique - storytelling problem?



  • @shinjifujioka Omg thanks a lot! πŸ˜‡

    Yeah that might be it πŸ™‚ I will jump on the clouds when I am at home.

    Appreciate the comment and I am happy you like it !!



  • This is so lovely and really suits childrens illustration! I love your composition πŸ™‚ I hope you do revisit your other illustration with the girl and the bird as it was so beautiful.
    I personally preferred your first rabbit character with the short legs, to me he had more personality but that's only my opinion! Your rabbit character works really well too πŸ™‚ His face is just brilliant and your detail is beautiful!
    I can't wait to see this in colour πŸ˜ƒ



  • @hannahmccaffery thank you!!! :smiling_face_with_open_mouth_smiling_eyes:

    Yeah maybe I will.. I would like to see interaction between them, but in diferrent scene maybe. πŸ™‚ Haha yeah I see what you mean about the rabbit . But the current one was better fit for this imo.

    Haha mee too πŸ™‚ color is not my strong avenue so I will fight with it before I will land on something showable.



  • So this might be it... the colors are laid and that is the final touch for me.

    any comments on that before I call it done? I basically am, but I would like to hear some opinions on the colors first !! πŸ™‚

    anyways this whole process was really long so far and loved working on that and I am so thankful for every advice and comments I've got for it so far. It is a really supportive group here... ❀

    rabbit ilus.jpg


  • Moderator

    Personally, I love those colors. It has an old-fashioned sense about it that hearkens back to old-school illustration and their printing processes back then--the texture/noise you've applied to the color is right on the money!! It really communicates a sense of elegant simplicity and straightforward storytelling somehow. I love it!! Gorgeous!!



  • @Jonas-Zavacky This really turned out great!! The colors, values and composition are really working for me and I love the sketchy, storybook style. Looks amazing



  • @Jonas-Zavacky I love this. I’ll own that the style of this one is much more to my taste. I love the colors and the sketchy line work (I’m totally envious). But aside from that, this image much more tells a story than the earlier beautiful one. Score!


  • SVS OG

    I agree with what others have said β€” beautiful line work, and the colors are perfect with that style. It certainly conveys a story because of the feeling of anticipation you get from the character which makes me want to know where he’s been, and what good things are awaiting his arrival at that house. Wonderful work.



  • @Jonas-Zavacky Oh man, this is gorgeous, and it really is a vast improvement from the start! I can see it working beautifully in a children's book. Echoing the others: I would just keep all the sketchy lines in just as they are. They add a lot of character. The colours are working so well.


  • SVS OG

    @Jonas-Zavacky Love it!



  • Omg, so much of positive feedback 😲 I am really glad you guys like it!
    Thank you! πŸ˜‡


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