Music WIP

[lmrush]

So I am taking Lee’s advice from the podcast and posting progress early this time, this is my initial idea for music -the idea being that boy is putting seeds down to the song feed the birds the woman on the bench is playing but the birds are eating the music notes and the wind is blowing the seeds- so she needs to play fast. Any all critiques welcome

[Chip Valecek]

@lmrush looking good. Maybe have some colored chalk sticks next to the kid like they used the chalk to color the music staff and then the bird seeds as the notes. For the wind maybe add some leaves blowing around as well to help sell the fact it is really windy out.

[lmrush]

@chip-valecek Awesome thanks!!!!

[lmrush]

An updated version. Thank you @Chip-Valecek for the suggestions!! Any and all crits suggestions welcome and appreciated! Thanks

[Chip Valecek]

@lmrush Its looking great! You can really see the wind now.

[lmrush]

@chip-valecek thanks for the guidance!

[TessaW]

I think it looks great overall and it's an interesting idea. I just have a couple of nit-picky things though. Perhaps there's a tangent by the woman's thigh and the edge of the bench? Maybe if you extend the bench out on that edge a little bit? I'm also wondering if you could put just a tiny bit of space between the woman and the musical notes, just to give it some visual space. I would also be wary not to put too much emphasis on the bench area between the boy and the woman as you start to render it out. Be cautious with your saturation/values/details in that area.

Great job so far! It makes me even more excited for fall. I love wandering around the composition and noticing all the details.

[braden H]

Much improved!

You fixed a few of the tangents I noticed in the first sketch. There's still a couple of places where your lines are kissing the edge of the frame (bird head top left, leaves/branches middle right).

I love the concept and I think it's coming along nicely

[lmrush]

@tessaw thank you. I will try. It is so difficult. More practice

[lmrush]

@art-of-b thank you. It is so easy to see things after someone points them out. That is why I love this forum. Thanks again

[lmrush]

So another critique group suggested I switch to a flute and add more movement as my keyword was movement. I decided to throw the bird seed/music score into the air. I feel this piece is more true to my keyword but is it an improved piece? Would love any thoughts critiques thanks

[Naters.Art]

@lmrush I love the idea of her playing notes that are moving. which got me thinking (take it or leave it) but what if instead of a sunny day it was raining and the notes were drops of water falling from the roof and the bars could be lines drawn on the window. I just think you could get a lot of emotion in a lighting set up like that. but it's just a thought, I love what you have.

[lmrush]

@naters-calderone I'll have to flesh that idea out as well Thank you!

[lmrush]

Flute value study. I forgot to lighten the boys hands. Any all help appreciated

[lmrush]

Color study, not sure if I should do this digitally or in watercolor or both?
Critiques welcomed

[TessaW]

@lmrush Oh wow! Love the changes you made! It looks a lot more magical.

[lmrush]

Thank you @TessaW I owe to the forum, and to our Turbocharging 1 critique group, and especially @Joy-Heyer for her flute and more movement suggestion-You all should sign up for the turbocharging class we have a facebook group for the alumns

[Kat]

Great idea!! OK, time for me to get nit-picky I play flute, so this jumped out at me - the girls right hand is holding the flute incorrectly, she's sort of cupping the bottom of it. She needs to be holding it more like this (below) - straight on, supporting the flute with her thumb. But you DO have her holding it in the correct directions, which is great! This is a really fun piece

[lmrush]

@kat Thank you so much! That is so cool that you play the flute. I am so grateful for your post and the fact that this forum is so helpful and supportive! Thank you!!!!

[lmrush]

WIP in the color stage, it is slow going, I also wanted to check in with @Kat on the flute players pose, is it better? Thanks!