WIP Together feedback please

  • Hi everyone,
    I would really love some feedback. This is my prompt for “Together”.
    The idea is that the little girl is looking up to her mom and trying to imitate her. Ignore the red shoes. They’re just a place holder but they may stay.
    Should I make it simple and leave the back ground plain?
    Which composition looks/reads better? Is the newspaper lady distracting? Is she unnecessary? Should the chair just be empty?

    Any other feedback is welcome.

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  • @kimmypie It’s a sweet concept ☺ I do find the newspaper lady too prominent for someone unnecessary to the story and I wish the mum was sharing a moment with her daughter rather than focusing on her manicure. Their lack of eye contact separates them, reduces emotion and doesn’t make their relationship clear.

  • Very cute! And I love the little girl with her hair in rollers. ♥ I agree with @Lovsey about them sharing a moment, some interaction/eye contact with the mum would really bring them together. If there was a clear connection between them, then I think the way the other woman’s face is hidden behind the newspaper, making her feel separate and anonymous, would accentuate the togetherness of the mum and daughter. I guess you can make her a less prominent character through your use of colour?

  • @Lovsey Thanks so much for the insight. I will definitely make the interaction more clear. I appreciate you taking the time to comment.

  • @ruth thanks so much for the reply. I was thinking the same about the other lady. I will play with color to see if I can minimize her presence. That may not be enough to keep her from being a distracting element. I’ll try a few things.

  • I agree with what the others said already about the eye contact. In addition I think the pice is stronger without the lady with the newspaper. I somehow always start looking at her and wonder why she is hiding there, if anything happens now with her, ... but it is not about her.

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