I'm asking for new critiques for the redo of Oz...

  • Howdy SVSers,
    AND... work continues on my redo of book cover for Wizard of Oz. Last time I asked for feedback I was given the advice to:

    1. make certain my design was readable
    2. move Dorthy away from looking like a pin-up (well, that was unexpected...did I achieve a girly look @Lee-White and @carolinedrawing ? and...I did decide to keep some of the pop-culture visual cues of oz...)
    3. Get that title in
      Below is the line art and value study. Looking to finish with defined line art and watercolor...
      8x5 size line art characters oz book cover line art redo.jpg
      8x5 size line art characters oz book cover line art redo value study.jpg
      And just as a question for those REALLY familiar with this forum, do you add to the original post when making corrections on critiques already posted or begin a new topic?
      Love y'all bunches and thanks in advance for help and advice...

  • SVS OG

    @Laurasketches hi! My one suggestion is to move the lion further from Dorothy. He’s so close it seems like they’re too cramped. Perhaps make him smaller. Make him seem he’s further back than the others, create a bit more depth between him and Dorothy. I hope this is helpful.

  • @Nyrryl-Cadiz that seems particularly true in my value study. Thank you. I'll try that.

  • @Laurasketches I love it ,very lively and fun to look at

  • @Laurasketches Hi again, I think you did achieve the girlish look. Since I'm new here, I tried to figure out your question for those more familiar with the forum, and decided that I was simply having problems seeing your sketches properly, so I put them all together to take a look.

    So now I am able to answer with a few quick things: both of her shoes are barely on, which looks too uniform and I think it could be interesting to find a place to put one shoe, play up the jumbled look by having elements partly and mostly going out of the frame (especially the house, because I don't need to see the entire house), and slant the text the way you did in thumbnail 10.

    Of course I would much rather see what Lee White says, but at least I'll be able to see if doing this helped you get better feedback, and then I'll be sure to do it too. I was unable to see the border of your most recent sketches and was unsure of how the image would fit onto the cover.

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