Seeking critiques for latest piece.

TessaW

I'm starting to wrap this painting up and would love some feedback before I decide to move on to the next piece. Any thoughts on how this is working?

smithdraws

@tessw Really fun piece. I've seen my son assume each of those poses at some point. Thanks for posting!

WithLinesOfInk

I love it! I love all of the little details, all of the little stories. The only thing I would recommend is adding a bit more value contrast especially on where the focal point is. Where should we be looking first?

TessaW

@smithdraws Thank you. I have also seen my kid assume all of the positions.

@WithLinesOfInk That's a good question. Where should we be looking first? I'm not sure. Is it possible to have a successful composition when you want all of the kids to be equal focal points? Or should I emphasize one kid to lead the eye through the rest of the kids? Would you recommend a certain kid to have more emphasis?

evilrobot

@tessw This is looking really good. For me the main character that pops out is the kid with the blue box on the head. Then I shoot over to the yellow door and the kid peeking in. All the kids seem to be in a circle around the kid with the blue box telling me this is the important character. Not sure if that helps at all but that's what I see. So if that's the case I would get some more contrast around the kid with the blue box and make it even more evident that this is the main character.

smithdraws

@tessw When I turn it upside down and squint I am drawn first to the pink rug, then to the kid sitting on top of the sofa (his head against the light blue wall seems to be the greatest area of contrast). Then I go to the box head kid right in the middle of the composition and circle clockwise around the composition after that. Hope this helps. If you want to draw attention to one kid in particular it might be as simple as turning her/his head and gaze in a different direction from the others?

WithLinesOfInk

I think that all depends on the story of the piece. Right now it feels like the TV should get the most attention, but there isn't much a payoff in that. So what emotion do you want the viewer to feel? Whose story is this? Who's the leader of the group? I think if you don't have an answer, picking one can help out. For instance, the "group leader" may be telling the others to be quiet, or pointing out the screen. The active moment JUST before everyone is engaged is often the more interesting moment, and can help lead the eye a bit. We're drawn to action first. Just some ideas!

This Shaun Tan Image and This one were the closest examples I could find.

WithLinesOfInk

A quick fix is that I bumped the background down in value, and then added some light from the TV in varying degrees of intensity to some faces, making the center point (boxhat kid) the highest contrast. If she's not the center of attention, maybe move her away from the midpoint of the composition and throw more contrast on someone else instead.

Jose Ramos

@tessw Wow, it´s amazing!, congrats!

Chip Valecek

@tessw I feel like the perspective on the couch is off a little. Unless the leg of the couch by the girl in pink is broken. It just feels to slant down a little to much. Fun piece I would like to know what is on TV.

Tyson Ranes

@tessw Love this idea! Maybe a little more light bleed from crack in the drapes and cracked door, slight cast shadows on the suction cup arrows, and maybe tiny luminous light from TV. Great stuff. Yeehaw !

(edit)> Just saw the luminous light from the TV ,maybe play with different color on that frizzunt tho - Yippy!

Russ Van Dine

I might tone down the pink rug and put some light rays coming from the tv. The bright yellow on the table the tv is on will draw the eye there and the light rays will push the eye back into the painting...

TessaW

Thanks everyone! I didn't really intend for one kid to be a main character, though the kid with the box on her head is what kicked this painting off, as I looked over at my daughter recently while I was working on something and she had that box helmet on her head, but was totally engrossed in watching tv.

I think the main feeling I'm working from is how engrossed kids can become when watching tv- but I want that to be shown in a positive light, because they know how to live in the moment and are still so fascinated by things. So I kind of envisioned this crazy scene happening, and then maybe a parent came along and turned on the tv, because they knew it would stop the kids in their tracks and maybe they could get a little peace. I did think of the idea of inserting a parent in the scene, maybe showing them in the foreground with the remote, or on the couch there, maybe getting some rest finally, or being totally engrossed by the tv too, but I kind of thought that would make it be about the parent's perspective, instead of the kids.

I did play with the idea of having a more dramatic lighting scheme, but I felt that maybe it made the idea a little more sinister, like the tv is more of a negative hypnotising experience? What do you think?

Anyway, thanks a ton for all the suggestions and things you guys noticed. I'm going to put this away for a few days, and then come at it with fresh eyes and your suggestions in mind.

Tyson Ranes

@tessw I think you could over play the tv and it would have the negative hipno effect for sure. I like the piece as is I just see tiny tweaks with the cast shadows I mentioned previous and the other minor lighting tweaks also mentioned. I agree with your direction on it and your concern for over dramatized lighting and shadow.

TessaW

Ok, I worked on it a bit more. Hopefully you can tell the difference. . . and hopefully it's improved somewhat! I feel stretched to my skill-capacity!

Here's the last version posted:

Here's the updated:

Edited- Changed out the photo, because I forgot to fix the couch, as @Chip-Valecek suggested.

WithLinesOfInk

Awesome, this is great!

Katrina Fowler

This image is really great! I especially love wonder woman riding a stegosaurus. Awesome job!

Jason Bowen

@tessw You should post this image on social media and say can you find wonder woman in this picture.

mattramsey

really great!

TessaW

Thanks everyone! And that's a really good idea, @Jason-Bowen.