Developing Great Visual Stories: Assigment 2
Beste Koltuk last edited by
Hi friends! I've made the Assignment 2 in Will Terry's class "Developing Great Visual Stories". I used the "He grew and grew and kept growing!"
I would be very much happy if you give me some feedback!
@Beste-Koltuk I think this is well done. The story is clear and captivating, and it makes me want to know more about what is going to happen to this character. I'm working on this class too and I think you fulfilled the assignment really well.
crispalomino last edited by
I think this is pretty clear as I got the idea without reading the line.
Beste Koltuk last edited by
ArtistErin last edited by
I totally got the story without needing the line as well. Great job! love how you made the boy's shirt yellow against the rest of the background... it really pops
TessaW last edited by TessaW
@Beste-Koltuk I'm taking this class and you're making me excited to start assignment 2. First I'll mention that the image you've uploaded is so small that I'm having a hard time making out some of the details- like I think the cat is just facing the spilled potion, but there's also a weird optical illusion happening that makes it look like the cat is mooning us, you can't see his front legs, and he's peering over his shoulder. It also looks like the woman might be talking on the phone?
Other than that, I think you've clearly illustrated the prompt and I'm loving the setting and your style. I think you could amp up the sense of sudden growth and the feeling he's done something "naughty" by tweaking a few things. Here's some thoughts:
- On one hand, I like the size he is now, but I also think it's worth considering making him even bigger or the room a little smaller so he feels more cramped.
- Without changing his size another thing you could do would be to have some things in disarray, like he's knocked over items as he's grown.
- I think the woman and the cat could have stronger gestures to indicate their reactions, they look a little neutral to me. Are they startled and shocked? Is the cat very curious and wants to try out the potion too? I think you have more room to enhance the story telling through them.
- I think you could maybe fill out the room with more props.
Great job overall! The kid's face is so dang cute.
Jim Gleeson last edited by
At first, because of the illustration size, I didn't get it. My only critique though after zooming in is, why are his clothes growing along with him? Yes i know this is a children's book and you can't show anything indecent. But in the movie "It's a Wonderful Life" they managed to have something similar happen without showing anything.
I might have shown a picture of his mother dragging in a giant shirt she had stapled together using towels to make a shirt to fit her son who now was sadly realizing the cost of wish fulfillment in a way not felt since Mickey Rooney in that Twilight Zone Episode.
MM_ILLU last edited by
I agree with Tessa’s point #2 - I think you would benefit from showing things being knocked over or smashed as a result of his sudden growth. Right now to me, the room is big and tidy, almost like it was built for a giant person.