Riley WIPs
-
My Riley has made a super-strong robot arm, which she is testing out on the garage. Here are some character sketches and compositions I'm considering. I'd love some feedback.
-
@valerie-light I really love your first character sketch, and the details in the robot arm. And 1, where she's picking up the garage and the car is on it's side is hilarious. Perhaps you need to add a suggestion of 'why' she's invented the robot arm? ("For this prompt, we want to know the story behind the creation".)
-
This is such a fun concept!
-
Hello all! I'm looking for some feedback on this WIP, especially on ways to make a stronger story. What do you think? Also, should I include the prompt text in the composition?
-
@valerie-light I love this! Very well done, I don’t think you need the text but you’ve got a couple good places to put it, if you decide otherwise. Maybe put it in and see how it adds or takes away from the composition. Can’t wait to see more!
-
@valerie-light
I love what you’ve done. I think the only question I have about the story, is the why she wanted to lift the garage. Maybe the little shoots of grass under what would have been the corner of the garage could be a flower, and saving the flower was the inspiration for the garage lifting claw? -
@valerie-light I love, love this drawing! It's one of my favorites of yours. Like @AngelinaKizz mentioned though, the story isn't very clear to me. I thought it was a sucking machine or an electrifying machine at first. I think the garage needs more weight and foundation. Building foundations, even external garage foundations, are thick and solid and go deep into the ground. If you can make that happen I think you really have a winner here!
-
Awesome feedback, thanks all!
@AngelinaKizz I totally need help with the Why of this picture. I think she's trying to help the little alien... somehow...? (help)
@Jeremiahbrown THANK YOU! I think it's a sort of magnetic energy field coming from the arm. Does that read? Great insight about the foundation needing to be thicker/heavier.Maybe I could work in some alien tech buried in the foundation below the garage? A lot going on here, and I know I should've worked out the story ahead of time, but I really got carried away drawing this one.
-
@valerie-light This is awesome! I love it!
I agree that the reason she's lifting the garage should be related to the little alien... maybe the alien's flying saucer is buried under there and the garage has been built on top? Or there's another alien living under the garage? Or she's just testing out the invention to see what it can lift - and the garage is just the start of a series of larger and larger objects. I can see this becoming a great book - I want to know more about the little alien and why she's helping it!
-
@valerie-light Wow! Great job getting all the garage clutter in there! I love that the little alien looks so proud of her! Text doesn't seem necessary unless you want to have an illlustration+text for your portfolio.
I think the story is cute as is, but if you're looking to give it more depth, maybe show something underground (e.g. treasure chest, aliens living underground...)?
-
Posting progress, and welcoming all this great feedback.
I think I want to soften the edge of the foundation/shadow with some rubble. I'll probably lighten the whole thing up a bit overall, too.Is it a requirement for this prompt to be in color?
-
@valerie-light I don't think there were any requirements or restrictions on color.
Here's a link to the challenge page: https://www.critiquearena.com/current-challenge
-
@valerie-light I love the depth you’ve added! I love the soft houses in the background. I love the crater in the ground. What If you had another little alien poking it’s eye out of the crater?
As for color, there is no rule against monochromatic, but they said in the last arena, if it’s two really strong pieces going against each other, and one is monochrome and the other is color… color always wins. So, as much as I love your piece the way it is, I would suggest colouring it.
-
@valerie-light I just love the solidness/solidity (?) of the objects, it looks really believable! I think a kid would have fun looking at all the details. I like all the varied line widths, the values, and the way you drew EVERY brick without it looking forced. I also love the faded spaceship in the background for the same reason. I agree that some color would add even more. You could always submit it both ways. Nice!
