I did a graphic novel sample chapter! I'd love to know what you think :D

[braden H]

@melissa_bailey I made some changes! Martin and Shane (seeing as they don't usually hang out with Tienna and Mattea) cannot yet use ASL, but Mattea does, and so signs unless she is ticked off and shouting (anger management is an issue in her family) or in the act of cycling or hurling Mr. bear.

Thank you again for the feedback

[Asyas_illos]

@braydin-hawlette never mind my last post! I didn’t read it thoroughly enough! It’s great!

[Melissa_Bailey]

@braydin-hawlette good solutions. Even if for right now there is no plan to publish and it is just up on your website -- if it's a portfolio piece, you may still want to make sure that what you show is accurate.

Wow, it sounds like there is A LOT of backstory and worldbuilding that we don't see in this chapter! That's awesome! Is there a way to include some of those salient character points in the excerpt? In my opinion, it would be helpful to know that Tienna can hear but doesn't speak. Does that add to the story? If not, if you want the focus to stay on the brothers, then it might be clearer for the reader to have Tienna say nothing (i.e. no signing) in this chapter -- leave that for later.

And yes, of course you can pick my brain and ask any questions. Happy to share what I know!

[ruth]

Wow! Brilliant @braydin-hawlette! I was too engrossed in the story to notice any errors. I love all your characters, the story and your world-building, and Milton is so, so very annoying!

[lizardillo]

This is truly awesome! I can’t add any feedback to what has been said already especially regarding the sign language element (which I think is a great thing to try). Even with the minor errors, it’s still a technical masterpiece.

I’m sure I’m not the only one but this has really inspired me to try a comic again. I don’t have a story but as I would love to try my CBPro course as a comic somehow as I know I’m not a traditional children’s picture book artist. Thanks for sharing this and all of the processes. And thanks for sharing your Clip Studio session you did. I have watched it quite a few times.

[danielerossi]

Wow that is awesome work! Love the colour palette and the integration of sign language. The action and story build up and ominous silhouettes.

[Kim Hunter]

@danielerossi I really like this and want to see where the story is going. The story telling is clear and moves at a good pace without any excess wordiness that would need to be trimmed. That applies to the illustrations too. I like the great shortcut you took by showing the map with boring routes and shortcuts. This would have dragged out if explained as exposition. Nicely done.

i love that the scary giant dog is a poodle. Perfect!

[braden H]

@melissa_bailey said in I did a graphic novel sample chapter! I'd love to know what you think :

Wow, it sounds like there is A LOT of backstory and worldbuilding

Well, there is now thanks to questions from people Part of my writing process is making stuff up to slap on plot holes that others point out.

@melissa_bailey said in I did a graphic novel sample chapter! I'd love to know what you think :

Is there a way to include some of those salient character points in the excerpt? In my opinion, it would be helpful to know that Tienna can hear but doesn't speak.

I will see what I can do! In this very short chapter (which is all about Milton and Martin) it's tough to do organically, though. We shall see!

[braden H]

@lizardillo said in I did a graphic novel sample chapter! I'd love to know what you think :

And thanks for sharing your Clip Studio session you did. I have watched it quite a few times.

I'm glad it's been useful! I've made many more workflow discoveries since then, so if you ever have any questions or anything lemme know

[braden H]

@kim-hunter said in I did a graphic novel sample chapter! I'd love to know what you think :

i love that the scary giant dog is a poodle. Perfect!

It's based on our old family dog. We're not actually sure what it was! It's mom was a cocker spaniel and then there were various breeds of potential fathers hanging around the farm, so we always said he was a cocker scandal

[Lisa Clark]

I read through this with two of my boys (11 and 9) and they absolutely loved it. Laughter and suspense all the way through. Thank you for giving us a few minutes to enjoy a wonderful story together!

[braden H]

@lisa-clark Hooray for test readers! Glad they liked it

[Haywong]

Looks amazing. I love the characters' expressions, colour choices and muted backgrounds.

If you don't mind, can you share a bit about how you decided on the edges, shapes and gradations for the blue-purply backgrounds?

I really like how they are are kind of abstract and atmospheric at the same time- would love to know a bit more on your process for those.