@Melissa-Bailey-0

First off - thank you so much for giving your time to write up a thorough response! I really appreciate it - wanting to respond in kind is why I have taken so long to answer. But thank you very much! I don’t think you were too harsh or stepping on toes, but rather giving good, honest feedback.

Thanks for the kind words about the overall good things! I appreciate those too.

I agree. I think I should fix it in SOME way but didn’t want to have to do a lot of re-writing or redrawing things. So at this point for me, it’s the balance of releasing something that’s not perfect, vs spending who knows how long rewriting and re-drawing a short story.

Based on what you and @RachelArmington both said, I’ll probably tinker with their pose a little bit, and maybe her costume. Haha I think I went with the token mermaid bra so there was a small level of familiarity with the world.

Regarding number 3: That’s an excellent point that I completely missed! I will certainly cut the apology part, regardless of what else I do with it.

With the suggestion by @K.Flagg about a backstory - would a page showing/describing her character before this point be helpful, or just make it that much worse that she dies early off?