"star" WIP
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Started off with a fairly boring concept (gold star on a spelling quiz). Decided it needed more explosions and smoking craters, so this is what I've got so far
I'm gonna redraw the wagon and star, but I like the colours so far!
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@braden-hallett Hi Braden! I like what you have so far - especially the kid's expression! What's the story behind the volcano? I may be missing something obvious but am super curious so thought i'd ask.
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@braden-hallett I love the idea of the kid grabbing hold of the fallen star or at least that's how I read it. Clever idea, it's got energy and excitement ("look at me, look at me, I've got a fallen star, hehehe!") and the colours are good start.
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@braden-hallett great expressions and movement.
But I'm gonna agree with @KathrynAdebayo on this one -- the concept isn't clear.
Just looking at the picture, without knowing anything about the story in your head, there are a lot of questions for me. Why is the boy running away gleefully with a star in his wagon? How did the star get there? Why is there a smoking crater? Did the star make that crater? If so, then why is the star so small when the crater is so huge?
I do see the faint trail made by the star from the crater, but with the values the way they are, splitting the composition almost in half, there is a disconnect for me between the two.
Guess what I'm trying to say is: I'd love to see more story here, and for it to be more clearly communicated.
All this being said, this is a strong piece in terms of expression and drawing skill. I wish I had the control over value that you do!
illustrator - author - smiley person
mbaileyart.com
instagram.com/mbaileyart/ -
@kathrynadebayo said in "star" WIP:
What's the story behind the volcano?
Time methinks to redraw things! The volcano is meant to be an impact crater from the star
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@melissa-bailey-0 said in "star" WIP:
the concept isn't clear.
Better to know now than to discover it later after submission
Time to take another pass at the crater!
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@braden-hallett ahhh, I see now. If there were some smoking stars visible and sticking out in the crater that would show what was going on. On another note... I would love to be able to draw human characters and expressions like you do!
Website: lizardillo.co.uk
IG: instagram.com/lizardillo -
@lizardillo said in "star" WIP:
If there were some smoking stars visible and sticking out in the crater
I like that idea! I'll see what I can do
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Does register as a bit more a crater instead of a volcano now?
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@braden-hallett This reads way more clearly! I love the perfect star indentation in the crater. It made me laugh.
Andrea Zupcsan
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@azupcsan Awesome! That's great to know
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Bigger star is better star! I think I may give the kid some oven mitts
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@braden-hallett Looks awesome!
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@braden-hallett YES! Concept is WAY more clear and I love the dripping star!
Is it still hot? Could it still be smoking or glowing? Love the idea of the oven mitts. Shows the boy's determination and ingenuity.
illustrator - author - smiley person
mbaileyart.com
instagram.com/mbaileyart/ -
@Braden-Hallett First of all kudos to the great silhouette of the main character with the reflected light on the rock face. What an ingenious way to solve this problem.
I wonder if the perspective of the crater is wonky. With it being raised so much it still reads as a caldera rather than an impact crater. What if you let the background ground extend more past the crater? or flattened the crater a little? I mean it still reads well and I am being a nitpicky ex-science person here...
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@braden-hallett It hasn't been mentioned and I think it would help that perhaps the boy would be singed a bit after all he did grab hold and lift the star into his wagon, and if it has left little glowing parts behind it would have left something on him. I liked more smoke personally.
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@braden-hallett love this!the idea is phenomenal! I d seriously consider giving the boy an animal friend, to share his joy of finding this huge treasure.Shared joy is double the joy!!
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@chrisaakins said in "star" WIP:
or flattened the crater a little?
I think that's probably my best bet! I'll do that
@heather-boyd said in "star" WIP:
It hasn't been mentioned and I think it would help that perhaps the boy would be singed a bit after all he did grab hold and lift the star into his wagon,
I'm thinking of adding some oven mitts! He definitely would be a tad singed
I'll be adding the smoke back in once I've figured a few other things out@georgios-christopoulos said in "star" WIP:
I d seriously consider giving the boy an animal friend
Perhaps some terrified wildlife still shocked by the blast from the impact?
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Work progresses!
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If not done it's close to done! I'm gonna put it away for a few days and come back to it
