Society of Visual Storytelling

    SVSLearn Forums

    • Register
    • Login
    • Search
    • Recent
    • Tags
    • Popular
    • Users
    • Groups
    • Search

    Portfolio Piece WIP Critique Please

    Projects
    2
    6
    409
    Loading More Posts
    • Oldest to Newest
    • Newest to Oldest
    • Most Votes
    Reply
    • Reply as topic
    Log in to reply
    This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
    • Blayne Fox
      Blayne Fox last edited by

      Screenshot 2019-10-11 21.45.36.png

      Working on a new piece for my portfolio, here's what I'd love to focus in on in the critique:

      1.) I plan on pushing back the houses but how far, and do you have any tips on creating perspective lines in photoshop?

      2.) Can you tell that the boy is walking down school bus steps , following the lines of students out to the left? Do you think the slight fish-eye perspective is believable?

      3.) Is it too busy?

      And of course, if you have any other critiques or comments, feel free to share, your feedback is so valuable and thank you so much for taking the time to lend a hand!

      Best,

      Blayne Fox

      Heather Boyd 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 4
      • Heather Boyd
        Heather Boyd @Blayne Fox last edited by Heather Boyd

        @Blayne-Fox

        Few things I noticed right away:

        3 dogs heads on the right in the back sit uncomfortably aligned for me at least with the windows and doors of the house behind, even though they are slightly off.

        1. I did see the boy coming off a bus, and I like the perspective like around the corner you've created. However I see the step where the other childs foot steps down on being too far higher than where your main boy is stepping down, that and a bit lacking in depth, drops down - I am trying hard to communicate what I mean sorry.

        Story wise the boy is getting off the bus to find his dog, whose now turned into a dog man - I am really sorry I don't understand. Depending on your story I can't say whether it's too busy or not. Is this related to this months contest?

        Anyways I hope something I said helps, I do find it intriguing especially the perspective. 🙂

        Instagram: www.instagram.com/heatherboyd.illustration/
        Website: https://heatherboydillustration.ca
        Shop: https://www.inprnt.com/search/products?q=HeatherBoydIllustration
        Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/heatherboydillustration

        Be blessed,

        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • Blayne Fox
          Blayne Fox last edited by

          Hi @Heather-Boyd thanks so much for the critique! The story doesn't have to do with this month's theme, it revolves around a boy who lost his dog and gets off the bus one day to find dog agents greeting him at the bus stop to let him know HIS dog is a missing agent and they need his help to find him. It's a bit harder to show all of this, but the title of the piece will help a bit as it's called "What to Know About Agent Brady".

          I thought something was off about the steps of the bus, thank you for pointing that out! I think the alignment will falter once I push back those houses.

          Thanks for taking the time to critique my work! I really appreciate it!

          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
          • Blayne Fox
            Blayne Fox last edited by

            Screenshot 2019-10-16 10.20.38.png

            @Heather-Boyd I developed the sketch and I believe this version works better with the composition, what are your thoughts on this?

            Heather Boyd 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 4
            • Heather Boyd
              Heather Boyd @Blayne Fox last edited by Heather Boyd

              @Blayne-Fox I like how the bus works better. I’m not great on crowds scenes as I haven’t managed to draw one yet, lols however I find the three children to the left a bit tight. The dogs look great ( the far right dogs head is just a bit tangent off the corner of the building) great expression though! and the building in that back is great because the foreground is busy and so the background can breathe a bit now. The grass they are standing on should continue behind the dog agents legs if that’s grass. Nice alteration to the photograph of the dog and his family on the boys back pack, that sells dog as dog not dog as super agent. And I noticed nice change in a fathers facial expression. Perhaps if there’s any space move a child (one just behind the far left dog ahead of the father and son ) in front of a dog agent and have them react ( not sure) lols. But I do think it reads better and thanks that you care about my opinion. 🙂

              Edit note, perhaps remove the boy I suggested entirely that way there’s an uneven number of characters, and perhaps turn the young student girls head who just got off the bus (left) towards the boy getting off the bus and have a reaction to both the dog agents and her knowing he’s looking for his dog. Anyways you’ve done very well and you’ll do what is best for your story. I look forward to whatever is your next step.

              Are you on Instagram?

              Have a good day,

              Instagram: www.instagram.com/heatherboyd.illustration/
              Website: https://heatherboydillustration.ca
              Shop: https://www.inprnt.com/search/products?q=HeatherBoydIllustration
              Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/heatherboydillustration

              Be blessed,

              Blayne Fox 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • Blayne Fox
                Blayne Fox @Heather Boyd last edited by

                @Heather-Boyd I value any critique I receive, as it can only improve my work. Thanks for giving such thorough insight for me to better develop my piece! I will play around with the placement of the child for sure, as I agree the middle ground is cluttering the composition.

                Thanks again for the wonderful critique, and yes, I am on Instagram! My handle is @blaynefox.art

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                • First post
                  Last post