@DaniDuck I really feel for you. I get it. I'm a mum of a 12 & 14 year old. My husband runs a martial arts school, so this means he's usually not home until the kids are in bed. I feel like a single parent sometimes. I'm also freelancing from home.
I can feel your overwhelm just reading your words. Take a deep, long breath. Be kind to yourself.
Some stuff I learnt the hard way:
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Learn one thing at a time. Choose one course, or have one drawing challenge and give yourself a timeframe. For example, give yourself 3 months to study different botanicals. You absorb more that way than if you try to learn 5 things at once.
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Household stuff: clean less! It won't be the end of the world. Spend an hour on a weekend and have the whole family do chores together. Even the 3 year old can put away toys and wipe down surfaces. What's done in that hour is done. What's not done can wait.
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Food: cook in bulk and freeze stuff so you don't have to cook every night. I cook every second night. Your family won't die if they eat the same meal 2 nights in a row. We also have a take out night. I beat myself for years because I had to resort to feeding my kids cereal for dinner occasionally. Then I found out they LOVED it and wished I'll let them do it more often.
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Don't rush. Depth is better than quantity. Do less but do it better. Create between the cracks. Find time for you because you is important.
Big hugs xo
Cindy