@DaniDuck I really feel for you. I get it. I'm a mum of a 12 & 14 year old. My husband runs a martial arts school, so this means he's usually not home until the kids are in bed. I feel like a single parent sometimes. I'm also freelancing from home.
I can feel your overwhelm just reading your words. Take a deep, long breath. Be kind to yourself.
Some stuff I learnt the hard way:
Learn one thing at a time. Choose one course, or have one drawing challenge and give yourself a timeframe. For example, give yourself 3 months to study different botanicals. You absorb more that way than if you try to learn 5 things at once.
Household stuff: clean less! It won't be the end of the world. Spend an hour on a weekend and have the whole family do chores together. Even the 3 year old can put away toys and wipe down surfaces. What's done in that hour is done. What's not done can wait.
Food: cook in bulk and freeze stuff so you don't have to cook every night. I cook every second night. Your family won't die if they eat the same meal 2 nights in a row. We also have a take out night. I beat myself for years because I had to resort to feeding my kids cereal for dinner occasionally. Then I found out they LOVED it and wished I'll let them do it more often.
Don't rush. Depth is better than quantity. Do less but do it better. Create between the cracks. Find time for you because you is important.
Big hugs xo