January Challenge WIP feedback appreciated.

  • Very good

  • I think the planet and the stars area are texturally inconsistent and it's dragging my eye up there and out of the middle.

    Maybe sharpen up the planet details just a little bit, then push it back a bit into the background of the sky?

  • I love the look of it! My only idea might be to flip the light shining on the planet to the right; on the inside toward the middle, so it doesn't send us out of the picture. Otherwise, it's beautiful!

  • @deborah-Haagenson Or maybe move the planet to the right side. Then you wouldn't have to change the planet.

  • Im curious to know what your intention is with the trees, Were they destroyed by the machine?

  • @Aleksey Yes. They were driven across by the giant robot. .

  • @chrisaakins i think that it would be more affective if instead of breaking at the base, they were broken in the middle, kinda like you would break a popsicle stick in the middle?

  • @Aleksey It just occurred to me that if they were trodden upon in a forward direction they would be pointing forward and would be even more smashed. Hmmm. I will have to think about this. How would I depict this?

  • @chrisaakins i think more mass of the trunks would still be im the ground, while the smashed part would be breaking off of it.
    Theres some good images on google I found when i searched “broken tree” where you’ll see how the mass of the trunk is still in the ground, while if you search “uprooted tree” you’ll see the roots sticking out with the whole tree. Maybe a good mix of both might help show “woah something big came through here and destroyed these trees”

  • So I decided to redo my idea and go for the inhospitable planet idea. How do you like the new direction?What story does it tell? What improvements would you make?
    Jan WIP revision.JPG

  • I add more value and intensified the colors on the guy. NOt getting much feedback on this one. Cannot tell whether that is good or bad...

    Will and the tracks.jpg

  • I also thought about cropping it like this:
    Cropped version.JPG
    What say you?

  • @chrisaakins I love how you've done the snow and particularly the swirling snow in the wind and the sky.

    I guess I'm not feeling much else from it though. Maybe it's the straight line of the tracks or just the lack of anything else in the image but I feel like there needs to be something more to hold my attention and keep me wondering what might be going on. Perhaps some hint at what made the tracks or a more intriguing landscape.

  • Moderator

    As neschof says above, the sky is gorgeous. it's very billowy and snow-filled. Lovely!!

    I wonder if the tracks themselves need some more definition? Like, maybe some debris or snow mounds with shadows? They seem very soft and gentle, but usually tracks in the snow aren't quite so consistently clean. I get that the snow has been swirling and maybe covered up some of the raw broken snow, but I wonder if maybe it might be interesting to add it back in... Your earlier version where you ran over the tree suggested a bit of chunkiness or density to the snow. Maybe incorporate some of that? I think what I'm personally missing is a sense of edges.

    Your instinct to add more shadows and deeper values is good! It made things a lot deeper and richer. I'd keep going with that. There is something interesting about "whiteout" conditions created by blustering snow, and I can see how that might narrow the value range of everything into a lot of subtle greys, but maybe a couple layers of flurries behind and in front of the spaceman might help to communicate the depth and scale you're wanting to suggest? That way you can up the whites and deepen the darks in the snow, and the snow floating on top will contrast against them?

    I dunno--just my 2¢. It's coming along!!!! I love love love the cold, hard blues you've chosen. They're very chilly! And the subtle pale blues of the snow is very delicate! Well done!!

  • Thankyou @Coreyartus and @neschof for your input. I was inclined to agree that it looked boring. I added some line work and the suggestion of a crash or burning city (let your imagination decide.) I also added some rocks and a cliff and more whirling snow. How's that?
    Will and the tracks with crash.jpg

  • @chrisaakins much better - you work fast!

  • Moderator

    Wow, that's so much clearer!! And swift!! Kudos!!

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