December WIP - feedback really appreciated

  • I'm noticing several tangents near the edges that sort of take the eye away from the focal point (i.e. airplanes, cup of pens in the bottom left corner)

    Maybe cropping the composition a bit more could bring the attention to the children more, and solve those tangents? Idk.

    I agree that the the moon's face is plenty feminine.

    I love that you took a positive spin on the prompt; it definitely could lead to some very depressing images if not carefully handled.

  • I love your concept! I love the little details you've put here with the tiny astronaut and the planes. And the story is on point!

    I just have 2 things to add:

    1. The floor line is slanting down to the right and it's throwing me a wee bit off. It looks like the room is tilted and since the attic roof is also slanting and the characters are also leaning to the right.

    2. The moon looks like it's right up at the window. How about shifting the moon to the left edge of the window (remove the window door if required or you can put one open on the other side) so that there's some breathing room on the right side between the moon and the window.

    I'm really looking forward to see this in color! ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Thank you so much. So many constructive and actionable feedback.
    @Kevin-Longueil @Coley Thank you so much. I will play a bit more with the design of the moon.
    @idid @peteolczyk thank you. I hope I get to finish this one before the end of the month :-).
    @danielerossi I had one more image with these 2 characters I have done earlier this year. I have no story for them yet. But I want to develop a few sequential images for my portfolio, to make it looks like it could be a book :-),
    @Debra-Garcia Really good catch with the tangents. I will definitely work on that.
    @Neha-Rawat I want to avoid having a straight line for the floor, to add a bit more energy. But maybe it is too much. I will try out another way.

  • moon crops.jpg

    An update on the WIP:
    Which comp works better for you?

    I am very unsure about the color of this piece. I might end up doing a mono-color piece for now due to not having enough time to explore the color at this moment.

  • Moderator

    @xin-li i like the vertical format. #1

  • @xin-li My vote's for #1. It gives me a nice sense of height, which I think is necessary to make the moon comfortably in the sky ๐Ÿ™‚

    Awesome work. I think it would look great mostly monotone with small spots for the characters and moon ๐Ÿ™‚

  • @burvantill @Braden-Hallett thank you for the feedback. Now I am ready to paint this piece :-).

  • @xin-li I agree with @Braden-Hallett i think monotone would work out really well. maybe adding a little colour to emphasise the places you want peopleโ€™s eyes to bounce around.

  • SVS OG

    I only just saw this, but really like the take on the prompt and agree that the vertical version is the way to go. Good luck with the finish!

  • @xin-li Lovely concept! 1 works better. however, you may want to consider make the comp a little bit more dynamical. Right now this image has a tendency of being symmetric (a big trangle, with things distributed almost equally on its left and right) and thus being stable instead of dynamical. Change the position of the boy and objects in front of him should help. Shifting the position of moon a little bit may help, too, from my perspective.

  • @peteolczyk and @LauraA, thank you for the feedback.
    @idid Definitely good point, I will see what I can do.

    Really not sure if I will make it on time this month. But I have a lot of fun coming up with ideas for this prompt. If I run out of time, I will paint it in Jan :-).

  • Comp 1 for me. It's looking great!

  • SVS OG

    Definitely 1. The moons is just well framed in that one.

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