Lol - don't hate me, but I think you had it right on the first pass :p I think your original size read more "raccoon."
I don't think the cage is too big at all - I think you're right, the value of that cage should be similar to the background, so that can help pull it all back and it won't compete.
I love the idea of you pushing the gesture of right raccoon to match the motion of the the other raccoons I didn't even notice how he was kind of half-assing it. "Come on Colin! Get your head in the game!"
Haha, and one last thing cause I just noticed it - does the middle raccoon's head look like it's in an inappropriate place? I don't know if it's worth mentioning, but the bear does look a little surprised IF it feels a little bit funky, I think it can easily be fixed by grouping the middle raccoon with either his right or left comrade - this may push the dynamic feel of it too, by giving it more of a forced visual angle to draw your eye in, and you can still keep his head according to the golden ration. Win Win Win? You loose some of that balance with him in the center, but I think that's ok with this being a mid-action illustration.
I just love these bandit Raccoons.
I did my homework! I just had to figure out a story I wanted to tell - which is always one of the hardest parts for me. This is about a family of Mammoths that we're forced to leave the mainland of Southern California 30,000 years ago to find a new home on one of the islands just off the coast (where they evolved into pygmy Mammoths (cuuute) and then also went extinct (booo). So I'm going for a double tragedy kind of feel here).
I did a lot of research by going down memory lane - The White Seal, The Last Unicorn, The Land Before Time - I want this to be suggested terror/violence that an 6-8 year old can digest, in the 70's.
All the images are of the Mammoth's escaping a fire.
I hope they're clear enough to see! Because I would love feedback on which ones you're feeling/which ones are working.
Just in case the visual's aren't clear -
1.View of Elephants swimming away from the beach, with the "hero" mammoth standing at the shore making sure everyone gets in safely. (kind of a Jurassic World Brachiosaurus kind of vibe)
2.Hero elephant fighting off flames while family escapes into water and swims away.
3. Mammoth holding up burning log while baby mammoth escapes beneath it.
4.Elephants swimming away from a burning beach, with swells of water.
5.Hero elephant fighting off flames while family escapes into water and swims away.
6.Elephants at edge of cliff with fire approaching. Some escape down the cliffs narrow patch, while some are forced to jump/fall from edge.
@kaitlinmakes Oh my gosh! You crack me up. Colin
And you may have a point about the head versus bear, pervo.
I kinda like them bigger. I was actually thinking of doing one more with maybe another raccoon or two in the extreme foreground so they would me really big. I’ll do that when I take Buster’s head out of the bears lap.
@kaitlinmakes They are all so dynamic! What a great story! I love the movement in your sketches. Right off, I like 1, 3, 4 & 6 for composition. Of those I like 1 & 3 the best because of the extreme foregrounds. I like 6 too for the idea, i would slide the whole image down so that the mammoths on the cliff are more centered than the falling ones. Maybe only show a little bit of a falling mammoth. Cuz it’s sad.
I can’t decide between 1&3. They’re my favorites so far.
@burvantill oh! I like that idea with the extreme foreground!
Silly Buster :p
My boyfriend liked those too - my favorite is 6, but it is really sad - so I think I'm going to push 1 for our collab and if I have extra time push 6.
@kaitlinmakes It makes me think of the scene in The 300 when the elephants are forced off the cliff. My friend Lori actually gasped and covered her face. Everyone loves elephants. So it would definitely get an emotional response from your audience.
Beep beep boop boop-
Here's the progressss on the collab - I would love to get feedback before I move on - I'm really starting to feel this piece but I'm curious if it's all reading well and flowing well Are the shapes feeling good in relationship to each other and does it feel like there is distance in the piece? Is anything bothering you?
I'm liking the idea of leaving the top end of the illo open, to let the fire and smoke breath up into a long snaking column.
I'm still really unsure on how to draw the trees and fire and smoke - so there's some research for me to do, and I definitely want to add more chaos into the waves themselves.
@kaitlinmakes I love the flow of the lines -- the repeated arcs in the flames and the elephants' trunks contrasted with the horizontal curves of the waves. It is so organic. I also really like the eye of the foreground mammoth staring at the viewer -- it makes it feel very poignant.
@kaitlinmakes @kaitlinmakes this is coming along nicely . There are a couple of small tangents. I’ve included a marked up screenshot to show you. I want to love that elephant in the foreground but it’s the only thing that might not be reading well. I’m wondering, If you enlarge the next closest mammoth and remove the closest one, would that help or hurt. .
I can’t wait to trade.
Hey yo! I totally know what you mean about the mammoth in the foreground - I didn't really have her planned out yet - just the shape - but tonight I'll actually work out the logistics of her anatomy and I'll also play with getting rid of her or replacing her with another shape.
Thanks for catching those tangents :p tangents tangents tangents - the constant battle.
Thank you so much - It's so nice to know what works - I didn't even catch the horizontal vs. vertical communication not how the fire related to the elephant trunks. Happy accidents? but I most definitely will push those relationships in the final
Colin is in the game! Do you think it's getting crowded down there?
Haha, no - I actually love how you tightened up the whole image and allow some of the figures to crop out - it makes it feel less staged and more organic (the new IT word of the week).
I also LOVE the bears new pose! It reads more reactionary to the threat coming in - and everything being cropped in more shoots my eyes up past the attacking raccoons, to the bears eyes, up through the cage and to the raccoon with the arrow - which drives it all back again. Oh man! I'm feeling this!
@kaitlinmakes sweet! I'm going clean it up so I can transfer it.... Tomorrow.
It's been a loooong day.
I really like your mammoths. I chose number 2 on IG. I agree with... I forget who it was, about the tusks. I can't wait to paint the fire!
I'm starting to get anxious, I don't want to disappoint.
Time to decide if I will ink it or no.
Dun dun Dunnnnnnn!
I've never watercolored with and inked line - so I'm up for the challenge if you go that route!!! So excited to play with this
@kaitlinmakes it’s not hard. I use waterproof ink so it doesn’t run. . You can paint right over the top.
If I use it
I’m having mental issues with my bonfire.
Want to talk about it?