REposting WIP Uncle Carl......forgot images last time ;-)

[MOO]

Picture #1 Trying to get cow in a correct postion to make it milkable by Uncle Carl. Does it work?

Picture #2 A possibility for cleaning a stinky chicken that has been skunked. What do you think?

Thanks!

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[NoWayMe]

@marsha-kay-ottum-owen I really like the one of him cleaning the chicken, hilarious! However, I was wondering something. Since in your story the cow is kind of a "surprise" element at the end, maybe you shouldn't show the cow before the last image ? I would be more surprising (and funny) this way I think.

I am not sure about the first image. Having read your story, I am not sure where it fits... Is it the illustration for the chicken on his head ? The cow is cropped at an odd level and I am not sure what he is holding in his hands, but other than that I like the drawing

[tombarrettillo]

Nice job on the cleaning illustration. Very well done. I like how you have the chickens helping, though, I would have another chicken holding the hose, not the cow. While I like the farmer milking the cow in the first illustration, the cow should not have any other roles in the story until the end.

As for the milking illustration: show the whole scene. Don't cut off the cow's or the farmer's leg. I have included a horrible draw over (it is hard for me to sketch on my computer). But it gives you an idea of what I mean. The cow's head needs to be larger, and further to the left. Turn the farmer so we see his back. It will fit better with him milking. Have his legs back to help with the clarity of him milking the cow. Also, the farmer's left hand should be on the front most udder, otherwise you end up with the same odd milking position you had in the original drawing. Have it set in a barn. I think it is a good way to start the story, having the farmer working, only to have the chickens come in in each new spread. And maybe that is another way to take the story: have the farmer working on a chore as yet another chicken comes in to interrupt.

[TessaW]

Have you posted the whole story somewhere? I think the sketches are really good. Tom makes some good suggestions about the top image.

From the snippets I've seen, this could potentially be a really great story book! It might help to have critique on the story as a whole though. @NoWayMe has sparked my curiosity about the cow surprise ending.

[MOO]

@nowayme Thanks! Good point on the cow...I'll have to think about that. The other picture is me trying to fix the first page I did earlier in watercolor (you might remember it). It's kind of hard to see but he is actually holding the teats on the udder of the cow in his hands. The original is small and rough and hard to get detail....and it's just challenging for me all around

[MOO]

@tombarrettillo I never even thought of having his legs back! That makes a lot of sense. I was gong to have him in a barn and someone said it should be out in the open...a barn will be good practice for me doing an interior. The first book I illustrated actually had a cow being milked in a barn. Maybe I will post it so you can see how I handled it back then My cow was more simplified and the milker faced away.

I'll work on it again tomorrow. Gone all day on Wednesdays so can't really do anything. Thank you for your suggestions!

[MOO]

@tessw I have someone critiquing it on the whole and I also have two writing critique groups and an editor friend looking the story over. With all the help I'm getting, hopefully, it will turn out really well. I'm trying to write things and keep that going so I always have some more to do, especially if I need a breather from one project. I'm kind of excited about another little story about a Granny that I have in the docket. I have two lullabyes I wrote about 25 years ago for my kids-another friend is helping me with notation so that they can be played and sung (my last little project was a lullabye), and a couple more rhyming ones that I might need to work harder on to be ready. One is a boy who eats ants and the other is about a girl who wants to live on treats. I have to learn to draw better so I can keep up though! So much to learn and so little time. I might need to stop after this one is done and try to catch up with my art skills and learn digital so I can finish my books before I get too old and die..ha!

[MOO]

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