Oct 3rd Thur: Mostly/all done?



  • My first entry into the SVS universe. Saw a twitter post on the last 3rd Thursday contest and I loved the idea.

    I think this is mostly done but I'm always questioning things like overall saturation, lighting, etc. Things that could be endlessly tweaked.

    My main idea was for the Ostrich to be seen as a reflection in the eyes--I don't know if I'm 100% happy with how it turned out but I tried a lot of different opacity levels and if I went too dark (meaning you could really see the Ostrich well) the image looked strange.

    The biggest mistake was in my animal choice. After getting 80-90% done with the image I was like: why didn't I pick Australian animals???

    Any critiques welcomed!



  • Really good, though I don't sense any separation of the figures.



  • @Steve-Young said:

    Really good, though I don't sense any separation of the figures.

    Thank you!

    Not quite sure what you mean re:separation of the figures. Could you elaborate?

    EDIT: I just realized I know you from the Centrifuge! I put my subscription on hold so now I don't have access to the forums there anymore. I think it's kind of a shame and I like how SVS does it (i.e. that don't require a current subscription for artists to have a place to interact). Anyway, nice to see you here!



  • I like it!! I have a couple little suggestions, do with them what you will hehe. What if you make the goggles' lens more mirrored appearing? that way you could have a harder reflection of ostrich there. On the wrench, you have dimensional in the middle but not along the bottom. And lastly it took a bit for me to realize that it was the robin's wing up to his forehead. maybe make a harder shadow across the forehead and lighten the wing so it is separated. I love the feel of this, and such a very wonderful take on the prompt!!



  • I think I really like this one! very smart!



  • @mattramsey hey mat :) nice to meet you again ;) I mean the forms of the figures relative to each other.

    The reason I put the centrifuge on hold is I have got way to much to do. Not only have I got SVS stuff to do, I am doing a collection of books, and other online courses. So I needed to put one on hold. The Oakley Academy was the one I used the least, even though I was learning a lot with it. Its course was a much slower pace than I needed to work at.



  • @Lynn-Larson said:

    I like it!! I have a couple little suggestions, do with them what you will hehe. What if you make the goggles' lens more mirrored appearing? that way you could have a harder reflection of ostrich there. On the wrench, you have dimensional in the middle but not along the bottom. And lastly it took a bit for me to realize that it was the robin's wing up to his forehead. maybe make a harder shadow across the forehead and lighten the wing so it is separated. I love the feel of this, and such a very wonderful take on the prompt!!

    thank you lynn--I tried playing around with the opacity of the ostrich/mirror level of the lens and it is probably the number one thing I'm struggling with on this image. For some reason when I try making it more mirrored it looks...off.

    I will look into darkening the shadow across the face to see if that helps anything.

    I'm not sure I know what you mean by "dimensional in the middle but not along the bottom."



  • please forgive my horrible draw over...i think a gradiant would work well on the lenses here, drop it under your highlights and ostrich. see the bit i added on the bottom of the wrench? that is what i was trying to explain hehe



  • Wow I totally missed that (wrench issue)--thank you for pointing that out. If we can see the plane on the inside we would definitely be able to see the plane at the bottom.

    I will try and play around with the glasses again.



  • Hey Matt. I am a big fan of the painterly style. well done. I don't think you needed to make the animals "australian" I never studied zoology and I couldn't identify them anyway:) I think they are well designed and they work and I do like your take on the prompt. I do have a few crits that may or may not be helpful. The first is I feel it may be a bit too cropped over-all. I would like to see the rest of the characters head (leather helmet and all) the crop is a bit too close to the eyes for me. and If it wasn't pointed out to me i wouldn't have realized the bird wing was a wing, I thought it was some kind of hat brim. I think that issue might be solved with some value adjustments and maybe feathery details. I like the storytelling with the blue-print type scroll but I think it looks a little chunky, you might tighten up the hard edges of the hard edge things just a bit, like the paper and goggles. and finally I think the idea of the ostrich reflection in the eyes is an impressive idea. its also ambitious and hard to pull off. if you really want to make it work i think your overall design might suffer for it. it may work as a spot illustration but in this composition it would fall into an easter egg category for me, without the text I would miss it entirely.
    I think we may have a similar style so when or if i post anything near the complete or abandoned stage, i would look forward to your input. thanks for sharing.



  • @kevinpaul
    Thank you for the comments!

    I wondered if people would comment on the crop. I had a much wider shot originally but because I reeaaally wanted to make the eye reflection work I zoomed in so it would be a little more noticeable. I think I have a good close up comp but I get what you are saying. The way I'm looking at it:the tightness brings out more of the drama (like in cinema when you want to show startled or excited characters you go to the tight shot).

    I will have to take a better look at the wing--you are the second to mention an issue with it. I guess I'm blind to problems there because it looks like a wing to me! (A wider angle would be one way to solve it though because you could see the full wing arching up and over to cover the eyes).

    So as far as the reflection (the biggest issue, imo).... My thinking is A. I don't mind if it isn't the FIRST thing that jumps out at the viewer. They'll see the animals/their expressions, read the text, and then notice the reflection and be like "oh I get it!" This is what I'm going for anyway. B. If this was 1 page of a book my sense is that I would have plenty of other opportunity to show off the ostrich, the aircraft, their workshop etc. This page would then serve, like I mentioned, as an expression shot with elements of their entire world present in little details (i.e. the reflection).

    So that's what I am shooting for. I'm not saying that I pulled it off but that's what I'm trying to pull off. Plus I thought it might be somewhat more "original" to do it this way. Though I by no means think that no one else thought of this "genius" idea lol!

    Now that you mention it, I think I do tend to think in "spot illustrations" rather than...I don't know how you'd put it...story panels?
    I'd definitely check out/give input (if I can) any work you want to post. Thanks again!



  • Here is some tweaking on the reflection and other small edits:

    And here is a rough re-crop. I just don't know if I love it more than the close up. Hard to tell for me because I've stared at this thing for so long.



  • I definitely like the less cropped version, the last one you put up. You can understand the wing better. Nice work!



  • I love this style very much! It is rich with color! The only critique I have is that the text in bottom left tends to get lost or it looks insignificant when it should be part of the overall composition? Maybe in the upper right (in the sky)? I could be wrong....



  • You don't have to have the writing. I would just leave it off of this one.


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